At this point, most of us are aware of the benefits of positive thinking, or have at least heard about it. In some ways, the idea of the “power of positive thinking” has almost become so commonplace that you may very easily be writing it off or forgetting about it completely. Or, you might even think of the concept of positivity as “basic”. Yet, there is a reason why you keep hearing about it — because it works. It is one of the fundamental building blocks to happiness, success and an enjoyed life. It is absolutely basic and if we aren’t practicing the basics, how can we expect to strengthen and grow in any capacity?
Aligning ourselves with positivity does not mean we are in denial or less aware of things that don’t make us happy or things that don’t feel good. It simply means that we are also aware of the things that do make us happy and feel good; and, we are choosing to highlight and appreciate those things despite whatever “negatives” we are also presented with. We continue to remember and realize the good and when it is harder to see it, we look for it — it is always there somewhere, even in the most subtle of ways. When we get into the habit of positive thinking, it becomes easier and easier to do until it is our nature to see the best in a situation, to recognize the possibility for greatness, and to bring out our own magnificence as well. Positivity attracts positivity, the more you give the more you get in return.
Connecting with positivity is simple, but it is not always easy! So, whether the concept of positivity is new to you or you think you’ve heard it all before, let’s revisit this tried and true method for creating more joyful, expansive and inspired experiences.
Here are 12 tips to connect with POSITIVITY:
#1 – IDENTIFY. The first step in choosing positive words, thoughts and actions is identifying what positivity is and what it isn’t. We generally label things as “positive” or “good” because of the way they make us feel – happy, comfortable, relaxed, satisfied, inspired, loved, etc. – or because of the effect that these things have on our lives, if they offer us something that we like vs. don’t like. Positivity recognizes and highlights what we do like, what we want more of, or what makes us feel good, uplifts and motivates us. Negativity denies the good, tears it down, finds fault and blame, guilt and shame, aims to wound and hurt, or predicts a future of pain or loss. Negative thoughts tend to come first and be much louder than positive ones, especially if you aren’t used to practicing positive thinking. Start paying attention to your own thoughts, words and actions and see if you can identify them as positive, negative or something in between.
#2 – CHOOSE. Once you have identified the types of thoughts, words or actions that occur for you naturally, you can choose which ones to encourage and which to move away from. Thoughts initially come to us pretty involuntarily, but once a thought does come we can choose whether we’d like to go with it or to let it go. It is much less important what thoughts happen to pop into your head, than which ones you decide to listen to, act on and repeat.
If you have a less than positive thought about anything, you can neutralize it by choosing to counter that thought with one of a more positive nature. If you notice words coming out of your mouth that are decidedly negative – judging harshly, shooting down ideas, dismissing offerings, or rapidly closing the door on possibilities – then you can choose to redirect your dialogue to be more mindful and in alignment with the positivity you desire to cultivate and share. We all have the power to choose which direction we would like to go – up or down, light or dark, open or closed, loving or harmful. It is up to you.
#3 – FOCUS. Your experience is directly affected by where you put your focus. If you are looking at a garden full of living, growing plants and you are focusing only on all of the weeds that you are unhappy about, how are you possibly going to enjoy, or even notice, the beautiful flowers, bees and butterflies that are also there? When you shift your attention to the beauty of the garden, the weeds look so much smaller and become less important. When we choose to focus on the positive, we are still aware of that which could use improvement, however, we are allowing the spotlight to fall on that which is already good to us, that which brings us joy and inspiration. The weeds are much easier to deal with when we feel uplifted by the rest of the garden. Choose your focus and maintain it – continuing to re-focus with every new vista.
#4 – OPEN. Openness is key to maintaining a positive nature. Recognizing that the future is not yet written and remembering that in each and every moment there are infinite possibilities for the next, makes it much easier to keep a positive attitude about the future and all of the wonderful “what could be”s. Be open to the possibilities, allow the potential for more good to come! Many times, we may find that we are closing ourselves off in an effort to protect ourselves in some way – from the unknown or from what we “think” we know. Although this behavior is understandable in many circumstances, it is important that we notice whether we are closing up and denying things too soon, without any consideration at all. Openness is not necessarily a yes, it is a maybe. It is simply allowing for the potential to reveal itself before saying no to it and allowing the chance for that thing to turn out to be good, great or better than we could have ever imagined.
#5 – LISTEN to your WORDS. Words have great power! We must choose them carefully. Sometimes we get into the habit of using words that aren’t actually true and are more of an exaggeration triggered by our emotions. We may say that we “can’t” do something when the truth is we can, but we choose not to. We may say that something is “the worst ever” when really it’s not. We may unnecessarily criticize ourselves and others or speak in extremes or absolutes. Listen to the words coming out of your mouth, are they positive? Are they true? Sometimes the words we are using don’t actually match up to how we truly feel and what we really want to say. It can be easy and even habit forming pick up language that is commonly used and slants toward the negative. Listen and choose your words carefully, they not only have an effect on anyone else who hears and receives them, they also have an effect on you. A part of you understands the full meaning those words carry and believes what you are saying to be true. Listen and ask yourself if you are saying what you mean, and meaning what you say.
#6 – HEAR your THOUGHTS. Not only do our words and actions have impact, so do our thoughts. It is important to pay attention to our thoughts and notice what we are thinking. If we notice that we are constantly thinking about the “bad” stuff that is going on, that has already happened or that we think might happen, then we need to make the conscious decision to balance those thoughts with their opposites. When a negative thought comes in, make the decision to think about the positive instead or at the very least to recognize the good that also exists, even if it is hard to find it. The more aware you are of your own thoughts, the more opportunities you have to shift your thinking to a positive mindset of gratitude, appreciation and hope. You’ll realize the more you try this method of mindful thinking, the easier and faster you’ll have a positive thought in answer to any negative ones that show up. Soon you’ll notice encouragement in more positive thoughts that come all on their own!
#7 – SEE the whole picture. Perspective is everything. Negativity most often occurs when we are hyper-focused on details that we find unacceptable. These details are all that we can see, as if we are looking through a spyglass at one small section of a picture. Take a step back and make an effort to see the whole picture – whether that’s recognizing more pieces to a specific situation or pulling even farther back to become aware of the greatness of life itself. Take yourself out of the situation and rise above it to a bird’s eye view vantage point, where you can see more from a different perspective. Actively seek awareness of what you may not have been looking at before. In times of struggle and strife when all you seem to see are problems, deliberately look outside of the tunnel vision you are limiting yourself to and things will become much more balanced and clear. There is always something more to be discovered, look for it.
#8 – FIND the SOLUTION. Complaining about something, reliving a bad situation over and over again, worrying – these forms of negative thinking are problem focused. Once a problem has been identified, move beyond it to a place of solution. Identifying issues can be valuable, however getting stuck dwelling in them does us no good! When presented with a problem, concentrate your energy on thinking of potential solutions. This problem solving attitude moves us into a more positive place of action, possibilities and hope. You may not always find the solution, but even trying helps you to move forward into new directions rather than circling the drain. At the very least, you may find ways to improve things just a little bit, which is better than nothing.
#9 – BE GRATEFUL. Taking the time to appreciate the good that is already present in your life is crucial to a positive mindset. Gratitude is an active practice, put it on your “to do” list! Writing or making a mental gratitude list daily is an easy way to bring more gratitude into your habits. When recognizing what you are grateful for, go big and be as inclusive as possible, include not only tangible but also intangible things, ideas and feelings. Include past, present & future in your catalogue, places and people – don’t leave yourself out either. What about yourself are you grateful for? What makes you awesome? We are immediately brought to a positive vibration when we are being grateful. Continually remembering to appreciate that which we are experiencing right now maintains that positivity
#10 – CONNECT WITH LOVE. Love itself is 100% positive. The simplest way to have more positivity in your life is to allow more love to flow through you. Thinking about people, places, things or experiences that you love or have loved is a simple way to connect with the presence of love within you. Once you feel it, you can allow it to affect you – your thoughts, your feelings, your actions. Look for love all around you, it is everywhere. Notice the presence of love in the little things, in the underlying intentions of the people and living beings that you encounter, and in your own heart. Love is always there, an unlimited source of pure positive goodness. Connect with it as often as you can and let it be your guide to positive grace.
#11 – HAVE HOPE. When it seems like finding something positive to focus on is impossible, have hope. Being hopeful is a positive action in itself! Hope opens us to possibilities, allows us to dream, to envision and imagine positive outcomes. Hope reconnects us with our desires, serves as a guiding light towards what could be and leads us onward with positive focus. The act of hoping occurs in this very moment. It unites this now moment with the ever present potential of the next moment. It connects us with the abundance of life as we realize the infinite possibilities and limitless nature of existence. Be present and allow the hopes within you to emerge. They are always there, it is our nature to create and to dream.
#12 – TAKE ACTION. Set yourself up for success. Positivity is a practice and it takes practice! The more you do it, the easier it is to keep doing it. Give yourself a little help starting out. Set physical reminders to help you remember to actively try any of the actions listed above and/or any others you come up with yourself. Track your progress! Acknowledge your successes – the times when you noticed yourself actively engaging positivity throughout your day. Celebrate those times! Use journals, calendar apps, phone alarm reminders, written notes, a piece of jewelry or clothing, totems, symbols – anything that works for you to help encourage and remind you of your pursuit for positivity. You are creating good habits by committing to act in positive ways and following through on this commitment to yourself through positive action. Keep it up!
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