In a world where it is so easy to forget how to just be still and at peace, equines are wonderful reminders and great teachers of equanimity.
Monica* decided to try equine assisted therapy because she was going through a divorce and found herself anxious, irritable and always ready for a fight. She was depressed, having difficulty sleeping, and anger and resentment were common themes in her day to day life.
Monica started her first session by just observing the herd. She noticed that the equines were either grazing, laying down, or just standing next to each other. After some time, one of the larger horses came in between two others, essentially disrupting their peace. One of the horses moved away. The other horse had a different response and instead of moving, turned around and chased the “offender” away. Noticing the sudden commotion, the rest of the equines lifted their heads up in alert and moved away from their grazing spot. Monica noticed the ripple affect one horse’s actions had on the rest and said it reminded her of her husband. He would get angry out of nowhere and explode, affecting everyone else around him.
As Monica entered the arena, she was visibly uncomfortable and refrained from approaching any of the equines. When asked about the horse that reminded her of her husband, Monica described feeling anxious and on edge. I asked if there was anything she needed/wanted to change. Monica replied that she wanted “the big horse not to be in the arena.” I took the horse back to his stall and invited her to see if she could join up with one of the other equines.
Even without the big horse, Monica was unsure of which equine to approach and again began to feel anxious. I encouraged her to check in with herself and do whatever felt most natural and comfortable to her — any choice would be OK. Monica decided to go sit on the stump in the center of the arena instead of approaching any equines directly. Almost immediately, a mini donkey walked over and just stood there next to her. Monica sat with the donkey by her side in silence. After a while, Monica said she noticed just how peaceful it all was and how long it had been since she felt this way. When asked what the donkey reminded her of, she answered “support”.
Monica shared that she had forgotten how much she enjoyed just being out in nature and how long it had been since she’s done anything fun or enjoyable for herself. Her life had become so wrapped up in the divorce and the sadness of it all that she had forgotten how to find a piece of peace for herself. She also said that watching the big horse leave the arena and then noticing how peaceful everything got after he was gone reinforced her resolve to end her marriage and to remove that discord from her life.
Monica’s weekly sessions continued to fortify her own calm and resolve. Through experiencing the horses and donkeys finding peace and harmony with each other, and with her, Monica was able to begin cultivating peace outside the arena by taking daily walks and beginning a mindfulness practice.
*All names and identifying information have been changed
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